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Because, let's be honest, there are a few rules we need to stick to, to maintain the slightest bit of decorum and decency to get through this complicated situation.
However, I do believe if two people are meant to be together, they will find a way.
If you do plan to make a move on your ex's friend, make sure your ex is kept in the loop.
You guys might not be in touch but considering you met your ex's friend, through your ex, it's only fair you inform your ex about it.
Think of how close a friend this person was to your ex.
Was she your ex's best friend or a mere friendly acquaintance? Are they closer than what they were when you were dating your ex or have they drifted apart?
One of them is falling for our respective ex's close friend!